So let me tell you this funny little story- this fall- October- life seemed to be going pretty smoothly. I could keep the car cleaned out, the house was staying reasonably sanitary and straightened to boot and Mike and I sort of started talking about the fact that maybe we could handle one more. It might be good for Ellyn because it would keep us catering to young kids. It would be good for Sadie because she would have someone that would accept all of her love and attention. Jane would love it, Mike has always wanted another baby and I knew I couldn't help but love another child (you might note my enthusiasm was not as high as it could be). By November we decided we would at least not do anything to prevent another baby until Mike deployed. We would put it in the Lord's hands and then if we still didn't have a fourth child we could feel comfortable with making that final definite decision.

Since that time we have had all the major sleep issues, Ellyn's therapists not as hopeful as they were earlier, our callings requiring more and more of our time, and a few nights ago as I watched that autism documentary and sat bawling my eyes out Mike and I had a heart to heart and decided that we were done and that it was okay. We (I) had reached our max capacity. The next morning I started thinking about the date, studied my calendar, and decided that we may have come to our conclusion a bit too late. The Lord obviously had other plans for our family. That afternoon my suspicions were confirmed. My husband was estatic and I was in shock. Considering our track record I didn't really believe it was going to happen before he left and really I was just wanting that extra reassurance. But I have to say that I'm very happy. Scared to death, grumpy because I'm a bit stressed about the whole thing, and because I know in two weeks I will be wishing I were dead as I build a closer relationship with my toilet bowl. But as I said, I know the Lord wants this child in our home. Two months just doesn't happen for us. I knew that if I were to have a baby the ideal timing would be October and October 16th it is. So please keep this baby in your prayers (and T&T's too).

Keep Ellyn in your prayers as well. Her sleeping continues to be an issue, the sleep medication either does too little and she is still awake (1/2) or it's too much (whole) and she still has a restless night and is groggy all day. She needs sleep for her little brain and for her parents' sanity. We are giving it a few more days and then we are back to no meds, a happier kiddo, and still no sleep.

That's my story and Barb, if there's two you get one! Have a fabulous day. Love,me